Why?

i often wonder why? Why this, why that? i think too much and let my mind get the best of me. i think the most frequent and recurring thought i have is, "Why dont you....love the God...who created you...and loved you... with a love... unfailing?" i often ask this when i think about non Christians; but really i should ask this about everyone, even christians. i know and see that there are christians that believe in God but struggle with loving him, or never truly love him. They attest to that by the way they live, they live for themselves and for things. Why dont we love God? Why? Why? WHY? Because we fail to grasp the truth about love. We say "love", and think, "emotion, feeling,random chance, fate, its a thought, its affection." NO!... this is not love. not even close. LOVE IS A CHOICE!! did you just fall into a strong bond with your spouse, favorite movie, best friend, children, job, family? i don't think so.... At some point you made the choice to love them, or at least the choice to pursue those things and grow your love. It always starts with a choice. God is love, God is a choice. You have to chose to love God. That's why it isn't easy to love God. Its not the predominant part of our nature, our nature is to sin, so loving God is radically against what we want to do. If you really want to love God you have to make the choice daily to lay down what YOU want to pursue him. We are all selfish, and we are all ignorant. No one is above these things. When something is hard we just decide not to do it. Sometimes we will do hard things if we have something to gain from it, but what happens when the profit and gain is taken away from our labor? We don't care to labor anymore, we deem it impossible or worthless and decide to do something easier or what is comfortable and assume everything will be alright. Well it wont. Lacking ambition and drive to do whats right will make you fall into complacency and idleness. Idleness is a sin. Idleness is doing nothing. We are too lazy to love God. We are promised a crown, eternal life, and rewards unfathomable in heaven. We don't have the tangible proof right now, and as a result we question whether or not it is worth laying down our lives for. We are so carnal and fleshy. We only want gratification that is immediate. i know. Everyone knows. We have become a faithless people when it comes to God. We in turn, chose not to love. People say that if your servitude to God doesn't come natural, or if it isn't easy, its not really serving God, or your not a faithful enough Christian. i detest that statement. Serving God isn't easy, neither is loving him. If it was wouldn't everyone be doing it? If its easy to serve God then you must not really be serving God hard enough..... When you really love something you make selfless sacrifices to show your love and adoration, to show that you place your LOVE above yourself. You give until it hurts and you ache, you give until you cant give any more and feel inadequate because you don't have enough to give. You give more than you have, then you give until you have given everything. then you find that the only thing you have left is your life, and you give that too. You give up what you cannot keep to gain what you cannot loose.
What will you benefit if you gain the whole world but lose your SOUL? Nothing at all! You will have a worthless empty life and you will die, and while your dying you will wonder, "what have i done with my life. what will happen to my things, my accolades?". They will crumble, they will fade. They will never be more than an idol you selfishly pursued and worshiped. What is there in this life that isn't temporary? What do we have that is always stable and remaining in the world? Nothing.... even the rocks crumble, they are fading just as quickly as the breath your breathing out of your lungs in terms of eternity. So why do we hope in the world? God is the only absolute we have, but we make him into an uncertain because we lack the faith.... we don't trust. We chose to do what is easy or convenient for us, so we can feel relaxed and in control; but the truth is no one is above chaos. God can control chaos. He holds all things in his hands? Can you fathom this? We take the strongest and most stable thing in our lives and turn it into an uncertainty. Chose to love God above yourself. Chose it every morning. Chose it with every breath you draw, because you don't know which on will be your last. When we fail to repent today, we have one more day to repent of and one less day to repent in. Do the difficult and chose to love. i hope and pray you sense this urgency. Lord JESUS heal our ignorance and forgive our unbelief. Give us the strength to love you more.

Ephesians 5:15-16 Be very careful, then, how you live—not as unwise but as wise,  making the most of every opportunity, because the days are evil.